From lingering glances and almost-kisses to will-they-won't-they tension that keeps us enthralled, romance media has a way of getting under our skin.
Whether it's an enemies-to-lovers romantasy novel, a swoon-worthy rom-com, or a TV series that leaves us with a fictional crush we just can't shake, these stories and our reactions to them reveal plenty about what makes our hearts beat faster. And high on that list? The slow burn.
It turns out there's something to all that romantic tension. According to Feeld's State of Dating report, 80% of adults say anticipation and buildup are a big part of what turns them on, while 86% find that attraction grows stronger as they get to know someone and share experiences. And with 90% reporting that fantasy plays a central role in their intimate lives, perhaps it's no surprise that many draw connections between their favorite sexual fantasies and favorite romantic media.
Of course, romance stories have been stirring our imaginations for centuries. From the romantic tension of Jane Austen's Pride and Prejudice to Netflix's suspense-driven Bridgerton, we've long been hooked on the buildup. And while there's still plenty to love about the classics, we're now spoilt for choice when it comes to getting our romance fix. There's everything from steamy audio erotica (read: Jonathan Bailey in Dracula) to fanfiction writers giving beloved characters new endings, sometimes with a decidedly smuttier twist.
Romance media isn't just something to get lost in. It can spark new fantasies, help us understand what turns us on, and even inspire what we explore in real life. So, we wanted to know which stories people can't get enough of, what keeps them coming back for more, and how fantasy is entwining with reality. Below, Feeld members share their favorites, from classics and new releases, to real-life exploration…
What kind of romance media do you enjoy?
“I lean toward romance films with great dialogue and palpable chemistry. My all-time favorites are the Before Sunrise trilogy for its realistic connection, and classic comfort movies like About Time.”—Annie, 35, woman, bisexual
“Films, romance novels, WLW [women loving women] specifically! Mazey Eddings, The Knockemout series.”—Kat, 33, female, pansexual
“Some classic movies but mainly romance anime and manga. From comedies like Kaguya-sama to gut wrenchers like I Want to Eat Your Pancreas.”—Travis, 47, cis male, heteroflexible
“Romantasy, omegaverse, reverse harem, dark romance, fanfic.”—Cass, 28, cis woman, pansexual
“Books and movies! Big fan of reverse harem books, and paranormal romance.”—Anonymous, 27, non-binary, queer
“Fanfiction, dark romance books.”—Curtis, 26, male, bisexual
“Books. Caught Up, Butcher and Blackbird, Patricia Briggs, Titan Mage series, Can't Spell Treason Without Tea, Legends and Lattes.”—Andrew, 40, male, finsexual
“TV, books, movies, ASMR audios.”—Anonymous, 36, woman, straight
“Fanfiction, yearning, and devastating whump.”—Anonymous, 21, genderqueer, lesbian
“Audio erotica and films.”—Casey, 36, genderfluid, bi
“Movies, music, series, anything that moves the soul.”—Maxime, 38, male, straight
“Nothing compares to sweet memories, but no real preference after that. Though I absolutely detest reality TV ‘love’ shows, which are stripping the soul.”—Chris, 38, male
What makes a romantic/erotic storyline really draw you in?
“For me, it’s all about undeniable chemistry and high-stakes tension. I love dynamics where there is a lot of banter, playful friction, or an ‘enemies-to-lovers’ vibe. The magnetic pull between the characters and the playful, high-energy anticipation are what really keep me hooked and invested in the story.”—Annie, 35, woman, bisexual
“Yearning and anticipation, but also full-blown immediate rip-your-clothes-off desire.”—Pafu, 34, male, queer/gynesexual
“The best storylines feature characters that know how to push each other's buttons. I guess you could call that chemistry. But there's also an element of deliberate seduction.’”—Chris, 38, male
“The buildup and the slow burn pulls me in, and the steamy eroticism keeps me there!”—Kat, 33, female, pansexual
“A ramp up to intensity. Don't give me that primal nonsense. Earn that fire.”—Travis, 47, cis male, heteroflexible
“Slow burn. Enemy to lovers. Anticipation. Well-written intimate scenes (emotionally and sexually).”—Anonymous, 52, female, heterosexual
“Yearning, tension, anticipation, forbidden love.”—Byron, 43, expansive, he/him
“I love a smutty daddy kink book. But I also love a couple that struggle to find each other and emotionally break me before they get their happy ending.”—Anonymous, 36, woman, straight
“Unrequited, chivalrous, hopelessly romantical.”—Anon, 42, man, cis-het
“‘He fell first,’ kink, BDSM, age gap, anticipation, chemistry.”—Dani, 34, female, straight
“Yearning is great. I love the ‘wounded dove’ trope and ‘fated mates.’ I’m really drawn to the idea of having unconditional love, but also someone being obsessed with their partner.”—Anonymous, 27, non-binary, queer
“I like the slow burn and watching a couple fall in love with each other. Seeing how a couple brings out the best in each other and helps each other grow is my favorite part of the narrative.”—Brett, 30, man, straight
“People finding and accepting one another. People being ‘ride or die’ for their partners. [I] love when a woman is immediately all in for the MMC [Male Main Character]. Prefer things to be on the darker side, more passion.”—Andrew, 40, male, finsexual
How does romance media intertwine with your real-world desires, fantasies, and experiences of connection?
“Not always. Sometimes my choice in media is a reflection of my fantasy. Sometimes doom scrolling brings something new to my screen and suddenly I discover a need I never had before.”—S, 32, woman, bisexual
“Romance media is another art form. It can reveal us and inspire us, inextricably intertwined with real-world desire and fantasies. Who doesn't want to be a prince or a princess awaiting true love's first kiss?”—Chris, 38, male
“The written word is an effective outlet. Keeping private reflections and musings, remembrances, odes, and dedications to the wonder that is love.”—Anon, 42, man, cis-het
“Movies with queer protagonists have made me realize how I want my life to look and feel.”—River, 46, non-binary/genderqueer, queer
“[It] helps me normalize my own weird desires, helps me explore desires with partners.”—Sadhana vani, 44, trans woman, super gay
“It's nice seeing things I've experienced reflected in novels, and vice versa—so fun to try things IRL that sound sexy in print!”—Kat, 33, female, pansexual
“It has definitely influenced my kinks greatly. I read a lot of reverse harem and that was what had me open to the idea of dating multiple people at once.”—Anonymous, 27, non-binary, queer
“Mostly by helping me find out how much of a dominant partner I am as well as finding new things to try with partners.”—Curtis, 26, male, bisexual
“[I] decided to explore kink and BDSM because that's what I kept reading.”—Dani, 34, female, straight
“Romance media offers something different from real-world connections. I get to feel feelings through characters that I've never had the chance to feel IRL. Reading has helped me understand Dom/sub dynamics and why I want to sub. I tried to deny I was sub, and reading has helped me be aware and accepting of myself.”—Anonymous, 36, woman, straight
“I feel a bit of a dichotomy. Being poly, most romance media I consume is mono-normative. It can be a bit tricky but the chemistry still hits home for me.”—Brett, 30, man, straight
“I love anticipation and expansion which can sometimes be seen in the ‘forbidden love’ trope. Characters finally hook up, and it is expansive. The new cultural awareness expands their understanding of their own lives, often pushing them to reject the norms foisted on them.”—Byron, 43, expansive, he/him
“It reflects my real-world fantasies and experiences. It's a good filler when I'm single. But I do enjoy sharing it with my partner too.”—Anon, 52, female, heterosexual
“I started reading romance after having my partner of 16 years ask for a divorce. It offered me insight into the things I was missing from that relationship, and refuge in relationships that were mutually fulfilling.”—Andrew, 40, male, finsexual
“Romance media definitely acts as a bridge to real-world desires by highlighting the beauty of shared experiences and deep connection. Watching or reading these stories helps clarify what I value most—like genuine communication, mutual understanding, and playful chemistry. While media provides an idealized, perfectly paced version of romance that is different from real life, consuming a great story with someone can absolutely become an intimate experience. It opens up space to talk about what we like, laugh together, and naturally strengthen our own real-world bond.”—Annie, 35, woman, bisexual
The best love stories are the ones that feel true to who we are. Find yourself, and explore your own narrative on Feeld.
For more, read Feeld's State of Dating report exploring romantasy's role in modern intimacy.
