Staying safe during holiday party season

We know everyone comes to Feeld, and to this time of year, with different needs and boundaries. Leading with care—for yourself, your partners, and your community—keeps things expansive, grounded, and respectful. These aren’t rules, but instead some useful guidance to help you move through the Christmas and New Year season with clarity and connection.

Here’s what to keep in mind as you celebrate, explore, and navigate whatever the next few weeks bring.

Personal safety during party season

This time of year, gatherings often mean new rooms, new people, and new energy. Staying aware of your surroundings doesn’t limit the fun, and can be the difference between feeling swept along and feeling steady in yourself.

These small but helpful practices can help you move through the night with more confidence and comfort.

Before you head out

• Make sure your phone is charged.
• Let a trusted friend know your plans for the night. This might include where you’re going, who you’ll be with, if you’re heading home or to someone else’s house.
• Share your live location with a friend if you feel comfortable to do so.
• Travel with friends if you can. But if you’re going solo, plan your journey home in advance and choose ride services with trip-tracking features (so friends can follow your journey). 

While you’re out

• Take drinks only from the bar or a server. If someone offers to buy you a drink and you want to accept, go with them and watch it being poured.
• Avoid leaving your drink unattended. If you need to step away, ask a trusted friend to keep an eye on it.
• Trust your instincts. If something feels off about a drink’s taste, appearance, or how it makes you feel, don’t keep drinking it. Tell a friend or a member of staff. And if someone’s behavior makes you feel uncomfortable in any way, trust your instincts on that, too. Depending on your location, there may be an initiative where you can discreetly let a bartender know you need help, usually by using some kind of coded phrase.
• Keep your belongings close and secure in busy or crowded spaces.

Stay connected to yourself

• Check in with what feels good for you around alcohol, energy, and your boundaries.
• Pay attention to when something shifts, whether in the room, in your body, or in your instincts.
• You can pause, step outside, change your mind, or head home early whenever you need to.

Alcohol: enjoy it (safely) on your own terms

For some people, alcohol can be a familiar and enjoyable part of the holiday season. For others, it might be something to avoid or approach with more intention. However it shows up in your life, you should always feel empowered to drink as much or as little as feels right for you.

And if you’re not drinking yourself, it’s likely you’ll be around people who are. Being aware of your comfort, lucidity, and safety can help you move through the season with more ease.

Know what works for you

It can help to think about how many drinks feel good for you, and to notice which types of alcohol tend to sit best with your body (tequila might be a yes, wine might be a no). Remember that things like food, medication, hydration, or tiredness can change how alcohol affects you, so tune in to how you’re feeling as the night unfolds. As always, never drink and drive, and don’t get into a car where the driver has been drinking.

Office parties

Work Christmas parties with colleagues are likely to pop up around the holiday season. They can offer a fun opportunity to connect with colleagues on a more casual level. Still, depending on your personal preferences, your relationship with your colleagues, and your role, you might choose to set boundaries for yourself on how much you drink with colleagues, and how you’ll interact.

If you're choosing not to drink

Being sober doesn’t mean missing out on the fun. The sober movement is continuously growing, and there are more options than ever when it comes to non- or low-alcohol drinks, and less stigma around not drinking. Your choice to not drink is a personal one, and you don’t need to offer an explanation to anyone about your reason to do so, or have any reason at all.

If you’re around people who aren’t drinking, steer away from asking them questions about why they’re not drinking, or passing judgment.

Respecting others’ boundaries

• Don’t pressure anyone to drink or to match your pace.
• Ask before buying someone a drink, and avoid accepting drinks from strangers (or go with them if they offer to buy you one).
• If you’re on a date, approach alcohol in the same way as intimacy: with awareness, consent, and respect for boundaries.
• Remember that alcohol can affect someone’s capacity to consent.

Navigating hookups and consent

Festive energy can open the door to new connections. Sometimes planned, sometimes spontaneous. If you’re exploring intimacy this season, a little intention can help keep things grounded, respectful, and enjoyable for everyone involved. Whether you’ve known someone for years or met them only hours ago, the same principles of care apply.

If you choose to hook up

• Use protection that feels right for you (condoms, internal condoms, dams, gloves).
• Talk openly about STI testing, safer-sex practices, and any boundaries you want to hold.
• Be clear about expectations before leaving with someone; even a simple check-in can make the night feel more connected and safe.
• Trust your instincts. If something feels off, pause or step away.

Consent should always be enthusiastic, ongoing, and given by someone who is sober enough and in the right headspace to make clear decisions. It’s a freely made choice that should never be the result of pressure, coercion, or manipulation.

You’re responsible for seeking clear consent from others, and you’re equally entitled to give, withhold, or change your own consent at any time.

“Freely given consent” means that the person consenting is conscious, awake, and has enough mental clarity and sobriety to understand what they’re agreeing to.

It’s also important to remember that past consent doesn’t guarantee future consent for anyone involved. Even if you’ve been intimate before, you still need to check in as people’s comfort, interest, and boundaries can shift from moment to moment.

If someone crosses a boundary, pressures you, or makes you uncomfortable, take space and report the behavior if you feel safe to do so. We’ve put together guides on recognizing red flags in casual dating, and how to ask for, give, and navigate consent for those who might not be sure what that looks like.

As you move through the holiday season, Christmas, and New Year, prioritize your own safety, and the safety of others. Staying connected to your needs and respecting everyone’s boundaries creates space for experiences that feel safe, expansive, and genuinely enjoyable. Pleasure and wellbeing can absolutely coexist. However you celebrate, may it feel good, intentional, and entirely your own.